What is the last thing you do before going to bed? Give your significant other a kiss? Quick cuddle? Chat until you feel like falling asleep, then separate to your respective sides of the bed and fall asleep?
That’s how we used to do it. Before our smart phones became our cuddle buddies.
I was quite late in the game to join the smart phone party. I got my first one only this year after my trusty Blackberry of 5 years crashed on me. It had sketchy internet at best. No Facebook. No apps. Just texting and sometimes Google Maps if you really wanted to take your time and work at it.
There was a part of me that really wanted those apps. Social media apps. A working search engine. But I didn’t really know the extent of what I was missing.
I was constantly on my husband for being buried in his phone.
Why does he insist on staring into that thing for so long!! Just put it down!
Then I got my Android phone.
While buying the phone, the employee was going on and on about apps and wifi. And in my head I was thinking, so how does this wifi thing work? How do I even get an app? So as not to appear completely ridiculous and old, I just figured it out by myself.
I went through about a month of being so happy that I had found this new connection to social media and the internet. How could I have possibly gone without this! I was finally out of the stone ages and had joined every other zombi that stares at their phone as they walk their dog.
Now that I can do so much more on my phone, here is how my behaviour has changed:
- Check phone when it rings
- Check phone in the middle of the night after getting up to pee
- Check phone immediately upon waking in the morning. Even before getting the baby
- Check phone after feeding the baby
- Check phone throughout making breakfast and after breakfast. Sometimes during.
- Check phone several times before lunch
- Check phone while ordering my coffee at Starbucks
- Check phone after putting kids down for a nap
- Check phone several times as I’m taking kids for a walk to the park. Check phone while at the park.
- Check phone while making dinner.
- Check phone after dinner.
- Check phone as I’m taking a bath
- Check phone as I’m putting baby to sleep
- Check phone as I’m climbing into bed with husband
- Check phone after briefly talking to husband and saying good night.
- Final check of phone before falling asleep
I’ve clearly got a problem.
Combine that with the other half being equally as phone-obsessed, and you have the budding of seriously under-engaged parents. I feel bad about that. So I’m working on it, okay!
But the sneaky little devil of a phone is getting into our cuddle time as well. Sometimes I’ll kiss husband goodnight and roll over to my side of the bed. And then I’ll see this faint glow coming from his side of the bed (yes, I can see with my eyes closed). He is over there on his phone under the covers! Naturally, I double check my phone quickly before continuing on with sleep.
What’s your relationship like your with cell phone? As cozy as mine?